Can we take turns helping with the girls today?!?
My 9 year old asked with enthusiasm this morning, reminding me that it was time to write a second blog post about how to homeschool multiple children (at multiple ages, and multiple stages, with multiple interests and strengths).
I mean, Minimalist Homeschooling is all about filling an education with what our children most NEED AND MOST LOVE, right? So, what if those needs and loves are different for each of your children? In my case, I have 4 great kids with different needs and loves, for sure.
I have a science and math fanatic – engineering anyone?
I have a sports and history expert – sports history anyone?
I have a not-yet-profficient-reader who needs equal parts of heaped on attention, and time alone.
I have a toddler/preschooler (there has got to be a name for a precocious toddler keeping up with older siblings). She is “I can do it, too” one minute, and “I will not let anyone do anything that I don’t want to do” the next minute.
It’s that last dynamic that I find the most challenging when trying to decide how to homeschool multiple children, but let’s go over how we create a simple, yet valuable and focused education for each child, while including (or not) the youngest.
Let’s be honest with each other, I literally just said, out loud, with complete sincerity, “I don’t have your underwear; where is your underwear?” Homeschooling all different ages is a unique challenge, especially when a non-traditional-school-aged child is involved.
What’s a mom-teacher to do? Here are a few ideas.
In the past, I have relied on Table Time to get the most out of our most important subjects (<read more about those methods at that link). Now, table time is not always an option with my youngest turning into a mini-terrorist any time she doesn’t want us doing it. She’s getting better with age, but there was definitely a time when she was the master of sabotaging school work. Group time of any kind was not any better.
Therefore, you will not find group time, or group subjects on my list. Group time doesn’t work for us. But, if that’s your thing, there are TONS of blog posts out there about that alone. Instead, here are a few other things to consider, whether group time works for you, or not…
1. Set-up Rotations
You do not have to be all things to all people at all times. In fact, you can’t.
There, now that that is out of the way, let’s talk about what you can do. You can enlist the help of others in the home.
This tactic highlights a great part of homeschooling: the relationships that develop among all members of the family. Our children learn to help each other while mom is busy, and they are better human beings for it. The older ones get an opportunity to be helpful, a role model, and a teacher to their younger siblings, and that is valuable for their skill set, compassion and empathy, and confidence.
Here’s how this works:
Assign an older child to play with a younger one (or teach them, or do an activity), so that you can dedicate some (relatively) uninterrupted attention to a third (and fourth, fifth…) child(ren).
You may have to bring out a set of toys from storage, or deal with a mess after the fact, but our goal here is some uninterrupted time to teach students who need some one-on-one tutoring. You can also use this tactic when you need a breather, or to address any other necessary task.
Have each of your children take turns helping with younger kids to spread the love, and create more pockets of time for you to get down to business.
The key is to recognize the optimal time to have kids play together, and to also know that your little one still does need you. In short, you can’t use this tactic all day long, but used at the right times, you can get some powerful schooling done by rotating who is interacting with the youngest members of the family.
2. Accept that You’re Not in a School
Remember that non-traditional-school-aged child? Well, that’s partly because your 1, 2, or 3 year old doesn’t want to act like a kindergartner, and probably isn’t capable of it. If we expect the youngest students to go along with sitting and working, or reading, or any other prescribed activity, we are probably going to be disappointed. Even toddlers and preschoolers who do participate nicely do so usually for a much, much, much shorter time than you might expect.
Here’s how this works:
Get creative with how you learn. The goal is learning. The goal is preparing our children to reach their potential. There are many ways to achieve this simple goal.
This looks like more field trips, more independent learning for older kids, more classes taught by others, more online options or apps, more library visits and library classes, more videos on YouTube, more open-ended exploration…
Once you know your priorities and goals, you can choose the best ways to meet those right now. It may not look the same as how a traditional school teaches a subject, and how you teach may change with different seasons. Regardless of the season, learning is still happening, and that is the goal.
3. Up the Independent Work
This is a season. We are constantly adapting. Like I just said, your job is to get the most important things done right now. Sometimes, the best way to do that is through increased independent work.
The idea is to add independent work so that the most important things get done, without you being the only source of an education.
I’ve tried teaching all of the things all of the time. What happens is that as soon as life throws a curve ball, some subjects or activities don’t get done. I found myself trying to play catch-up, and feeling like I was failing our children. In reality, it was an imperfect arrangement – an unrealistic one.
In my opinion, independent work is the biggest component in how to homeschool multiple children, in addition to a few other tactics.
Here’s how this works:
Decide which subjects your children can learn or work on themselves. This can be through reading books with or without written or oral narration, specific assignments, apps, classes… Then, step a side for a bit, and let your children go! As soon as children can read, consider “assigning” free reading each day, and moving up from there.
The idea is that you still check-in with your students, help with tough concepts, and keep them accountable. The difference is you are now challenging your students to take responsibility, show initiative, and learn independently. Again, these are great life skills for kids, and ones that we should not feel guilty about fostering. Yeah, I know, it’s a tough transition for us moms: sometimes we feel guilty for giving our students less of our undivided attention. No need to feel guilty, here.
Now, this does not have to be an all-or-nothing, or forever situation. That is, you can increase the independent work, without that being the whole of your child’s education – you can still actively teach some subjects. Also, as your family dynamics change, you may find yourself using independent work more or less in your school schedule.
4. Know When Is a Good Time
Many of us do this instinctively, but if you’re really struggling to juggle all the kids, take a minute to assess when is a good time. That is, when do your littlest ones need you most? When are your oldest ones at their best? When are you at your best? When is the right time?
Here’s how this works:
Once you have assessed the best times, set some boundaries and routines. Make a point of doing the right things at the right times.
For example, I know that my youngest needs me during the late afternoon and evening hours. Therefore, I plan to be done with the bulk of my heavy-lifting by then, and be available to meet her needs. I know when my kids are more likely to play nicely. I know when my kids are best able to learn versus when they are winding down. What time restrictions could you honor to make life easier?
5. Play to Your Own Strengths
Sometimes, we get so concerned over our children’s preferred learning styles, that we accommodate those to a fault. Today, I’d like to give you permission to teach the way that you are best suited to teach.
When you teach the way that you prefer, you are more motivated, comfortable, and enthusiastic. Homeschooling feels easier and more natural. Homeschooling is less of a chore.
There is some serious value in giving your kids the best teacher you can be.
Plus, your kids will have to learn how to learn via different methods throughout their life. What better way to learn those skills than with someone who loves them and is there to support every step?
Here’s how this works:
How do you prefer teaching? Reading out loud? Messy stuff? Field trips? Workbooks and checklists?
Once you have decided what sounds good to you, use those techniques for the subjects that you are actively teaching. Then, let your students learn in their preferred method when they are working independently (see #3).
Trying to accommodate all the kids’ learning styles is one way that homeschoolers set themselves up for burn-out. When we are thinking about how to homeschool multiple children, we are also thinking about how to be a great teacher for them. Give your children a comfortable and relaxed teacher instead of catering to so many individualities – that will translate into a great learning experience for your children. There is no perfect resource that can replace a good teacher.
Here is a video where I talk in a bit more detail about this logic, based on a question I received in our facebook community. Watch the video, and subscribe to my YouTube channel if you like quick, info-packed videos :).
I’d love to know what you think about how to homeschool multiple children. What are your favorite ways to make it happen with the least stress? Comment below!
Wishing you all the simple things,
Zara
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